"There are those who write things down and those who don't."  Judy giggled a bit as she realized she was talking aloud to herself.  "And a whole lot o' people in between who do a little of both," she continued.  With a sigh, she snuggled into the chair next to her bed.  "If you don't write it down, then it didn't happen."  Where had she read that?

She closed her eyes and unconsciously massaged her left wrist where the bullhead IV lay in her vein.  That damned thing hurt worse than the cancer she had fallen prey to, worse even than the chemo, its retching and wretched fingers tearing her body apart a single hair at a time.  She could make her way past the Big C most days, both of them...  Chemo..  Cancer.  caca.  The IV though;  it was a beast that gave her body no rest.

Lights twinkling outside the window danced for her eyes, calling out to her to notice them.  She willed herself into a necessary melancholy, a survivor tool she had developed of late.  From the tenth floor window of her hospital room she had learned the winking and blinking pattern of a world that seemed to have little to do with her anymore.  Three weeks from her twenty-ninth birthday, twenty-one days spent in this room, offered little else.  There were tests, biopsies, MRIs, EKGs, UA drops, Xrays...  blood..  blood..  blood.

The mean nurse would come tonight to torture her with the terrible stabbing tools of her trade.  She was a witch and Judy was her victim.  Judy refused to learn any of their names, these white cloaked monsters with their patronizing jabber and containers for 'points'.  She felt like one of her Grandfather's rabbit stew rabbits.  As a small girl, she had watched him hang them by their ears from the clothesline in the backyard.  He would coo-coo them and pet their fur, kind executioner that he was.  Like hell, as soon as they relaxed, he would punch them at the base of the skull with the hard edge of his hand. "Jellybean, tendermeats when they's relaxed, we don' wan' eat no wild blood," he had explained to her.  That's what these people did, chatter chatter chatter, punch stab stab.

Judy had wanted to sit up from the first day she spent in this awful room but was tied to the bed by tubes and wires feeding and recording, liquid gurgles and mechanical chirps, witnesses to her frail hold on life.  The visitor's chair beckoned to her.  'Yes and the chairs have voices,' Judy thought and it said, 'Never mind all that and any necessary apparatus confining her;  she should just get up and drag it to the chair with her.'  Finally having done so, it felt wonderful to have claimed such a small victory.  No more would she settle for an extra pillow, the buzz and whir of the bed adjusting its envelope to the wishes of its enclosure.  "I don't care about 'Ms. Pokes-a-lot' either," she whispered to herself, "She'll just have to torture me in the chair tonight.  Tomorrow I'll mark another year."

"Tonight is my last night as a twenty-eight-year old," she continued, "I'll spend it asserting myself as an independent woman."  She gripped the arms of the overstuffed chair and smiled sadly at her maudlin thoughts of yesterdays.  She didn't consider such thoughts memories.  As far back as she could remember, she had been blessed and cursed with the foreknowledge of what was coming next.  This was especially true of that day of days, her birthday.  Having been born the thirty-first of October, she was just one more holiday Child.  Halloween owned what should have been her day.  She had spent each of her birthdays in costume as a cat, a fairy, a princess, a nun.  The list was endless and her mother kept a perfect chronological record, 'Judy's Halloween Birthday Book'.  From the look of things here, there would be no thirtieth birthday.  She would finally wear the ultimate costume, sure to win any Halloween contest.  She would be in the skin of the dead.  Her prognosis was not good.  The doctors spoke in terms of days and weeks.  The more optimistic ones even said months once in a while.  No one uttered the year word.

Judy touched her smiling lips with her fingertips.  "I look stupid when I smile," she giggled to herself.  Her smile grew as she realized it didn't make any difference now.  She was alone in more ways than she had ever thought possible.  Divorced, no kids, Mom and Dad wonderful and oh so sad.  They were the pain in her heart that the IV was in her arm.  Their suffering was much worse than hers and she knew it.  Daddy's 'Jellybean' , Momma's 'Missy', their only Child, was soon to leave them.  Everything that could be done had been done.  Judy had run out of strength and, at some level, the three of them were aware of it. 

Still Judy smiled.  Had they changed her pain killers without telling her, she wondered.  She felt wonderfully free of physical pain.  Even sympathy for the awful pain of her parents seemed to have taken a back seat to this new euphoria come to possess her, body and soul.  She had worn herself out earlier, talking them into leaving her for the day.  Tomorrow was her birthday.  They could come then and help her celebrate.  She had made them promise to go out and have dinner, then go home and get some rest.  How was she supposed to rest when they refused to do so.  She felt a pang of guilt for pulling that one but it was the truth.

She settled deeper into the luxurious embrace of the chair, it being what a bed could never be.  Once comfortable, she implemented a new process she had conceived of  sometime during her three weeks of institutionalization.  A song by the Moody Blues, 'Nights in White Satin', was her parents' favorite.  It was 'their song'.  They were a very romantic couple, even after thirty years of marriage.  They had danced to the tune the night they met.  Judy's trick was to become her former little girl self so she could once more watch their dancing silhouette.  A tear ran down her cheek as she repeated the thought that had come to her as a Child, the dream that always came to visit when they danced, "There is only one of them."

A sound from outside the room interrupted Judy's reverie.  'The mean one is here,' she thought, 'Gotta get back in that bed!'  There was no time as the stodgy old nurse pushed through the door with her clattering cart full of probing and poking instruments of torture.  "Hope you're not sleeping, Dear," she said in her cigarette voice.  "Doctor has you scheduled for a procedure tomorrow.  He had a cancellation.  I have to begin your prep work tonight."

"Oh God," Judy mumbled under her breath.  Procedures and prep work, the terrible Ps, poke and prod would be closer to the truth.  At least the old bat hadn't said invasive, PPI was as bad as it got in her experience so far.  Invasive could be anything from a relatively simple breast biopsy to a camera poked up her butt to who knew what they would think of next.

"Depending on the results of tonight's workup," the starchy old woman continued as if  she had read Judy's mind, "Well, you know how it goes, Dearie.  These workups will determine whether tomorrow's procedure is invasive. 

'She acts like I'm taking a test,' Judy thought bitterly, 'Like I have some control over how positive or negative the tests come out.  What she means is that she wants me to behave like a good dying girl and make her job as easy as possible'.  Judy was amazed that the old hag hadn't seen her yet.  The lights in the room were dusk dim but 'Ms. White on White' was only a couple of steps away.  She watched in disbelief as the nurse touched something on the bed.  "Come on now, don't be difficult.  I know you can hear me."

Judy peeked around the nurse to get a look at the bed.  She gasped as she saw what looked an awfully lot like someone lying in her bed.  How had that someone gotten into the room without her noticing, not to mention climbing into the bed.  She had been deep in thought and comfortable for once, having achieved her desire to sit in the chair.  She got a little ticked at the thought.  Whoever was in there had better damned well get up and find another place to lay down.  She didn't like the hospital one little bit but found she had proprietary feelings toward her place in its confines.

The nurse stood between the chair where Judy was sitting and the bed.  "Oh dear," she choked as she drew her fingers back like they had been burned, "So young and pretty..."  She pushed the red button on the wall and bright lights stabbed at Judy's eyes.  In seconds the room was filled with people and carts loaded with last ditch resuscitation equipment.  An orderly pushed Judy's chair into a far corner out of the way.  She looked straight into his face and he turned as if he hadn't seen her.  Judy used every bit of her resolve not to rise up out of the chair and yell, "Hey, it's me...  you know, the one who is supposed to be in here.  I don't know who that person is or how they got in!"  She couldn't get up, of course, because she would tangle the tubes and wires snaking from her body.

She watched in fear and awe as half a dozen doctors and nurses worked feverishly on the person in her bed.  One stabbed a long needle down into the middle of the still figure.  Nothing happened.  A doctor took a set of those clapper things she had seen them use when watching ER.  He raised them frantically as everyone stood back.  He yelled "Clear!" then brought them down on the flesh of the corpse.  He repeated the procedure until Judy screamed, "It's dead!  Get it out of here!  All of you, just go away and leave me alone!"

Judy realized in an instant of crystal-like clarity that they couldn't hear her.  Then the room was still, more still even than the smoking corpse on the bed.  The main participants in the gruesome charade began to file from the room.  A gurney was wheeled in by two young men.  They lined the gurney up with the bed and stood by, one at each end.  "Okay," breathed the one at the head of the bed, "On three, count."  "One, two, three and lift," they chanted together.  On 'lift' the body was picked up and bundled onto the gurney.  They began to roll it toward the door.  Judy recognized one of them as he said, "Just a sec'." 

Maybe he had seen her...  but no..  She watched enraptured as he pushed the hair gently out of the face on the gurney.  He bent and kissed the face on its cheek.  "Ya know," he said to his helper, "Sometimes this job gets to me.  I kinda liked her."  He pulled a sheet over the face and they rolled the gurney out into the hallway.

Judy touched her cheek.  'I'm dead,' she thought, 'I'm toast and now they have taken me away.'

"Don't worry 'bout 't, lady!"  Startled, Judy turned toward the sound of the voice.  A boy of indeterminate age stood before her.  "Hey, my name is Henry!"  He offered Judy a hand.

She took it and relief washed through her.  She could actually feel the flesh of his hand.  "Wha...  wha happened?" she asked tentatively.  Something about the boy's appearance bothered her.  'He looks like the face on 'Mad Magazine,' she thought, a quite uncomfortable thought, especially considering the circumstances.

"Well," the boy replied, "By the book I'm s'posed t' give ya a bunch o' closure stuff an' lead ya through the um...  uh, oh yeah, the transition.  But hey, tomorrow's Halloween an'..  Oh well, see I was hopin' for a babe closer t' my own age.  Hey well, age don' matter, not t' us anyway.  Am I right, Sweety?"

"Who are you?" Judy asked weakly.

"I toldja once," he replied.  "My name's Henry.  My friends call me...  well, I ain' exac'ly got no friends."  He offered her a mischievous smile.  "If I did, they could call me Henry."

"Do you know what's happening to me?" Judy asked.

Henry stood there ogling her.  "Hey Sweets, is dem real?"

Judy slapped his face.  "I don't like you.  If you can't behave yourself, just go away."  She sat back down, held her face in her hands, and wept.

"Now don' get carried away."  Henry moved as if to put a hand on her shoulder.

Judy took a deep breath and raised her head.  The look she gave Henry would have stopped his hand all by itself.  "Don't you dare touch me!" she warned.

Henry touched his face where she had slapped him.  "Women!" he said and turned to leave the room.

"Wait!" Judy cried.  "Do you know what's going on here?  Can you help me?"

Henry glanced back and gave her a wink.  He walked through the wall next to the door and returned immediately through the wall behind the chair where Judy was sitting.  "Boo!" he said playfully into Judy's ear.

She jumped from the chair and turned to face him, arms akimbo.  "That's about enough!" she cried, close to tears.  "If you can't behave yourself or help me, you'd better just leave."

"You're dead, lady," Henry said, exasperated.  "I was jus' tryin' t' show ya some o' the cool stuff we can do."

"We?" Judy hung the word in the air between them.

"Yeah, we," Henry said, "We bein' ghosts."

"But I felt your hand," Judy argued, "When I first saw you, I...  I felt your skin."

"Yeah, well," Henry snickered at her, "I been in 'nis bizness a while an' I got control over some o' the things mos' ghosts don' know nothin' 'bout.  Yer a perty woman an' I didn't 'magine you'd wanna haul off an' slap me one or I wouldna puffed up my skin."  Henry took a poke at Judy's breast and her first reaction was to strike out at him.  "Go ahead an' gimme yer bes' shot!" Henry taunted as her hand passed through his face.

"Oh God."  Judy sat back in her chair.

"You 'n me is inbetweeners," Henry explained.  "I been a inbetweener for a long time.  I like 't but mos' folks don't."

"If that's my choice," Judy looked at him askance, "To be like you or dead, I think I'd prefer to just be dead."

Henry stuck out his bottom lip.  "Now that ain' a nice thing t' say to a child.  You ain' gon' get across talkin' t' me like that!"

"Across?" Judy asked.

"Yeah," Henry answered, "Across.  See, dead is dead.  Ya can't go back an' be alive.  Ya have t' help someone or somethin' like that, do somethin' nice.  Then mebbe ya get t' go t' the other place.  I ain' never been there so don' go an' ast me 'bout 't."

"So you're here to help me?" Judy inquired.

"Nah," Henry licked his lips.  "I came t' see the kids downstairs, mebbe do some Halloweenin' tomorrow.  Then I felt you dyin' an' came up t' have a look-see.  I'm good at feelin' stuff like that.  I wouldna come up if I knew you was outa yer body."

"You're not a very nice boy, are you?" Judy asked.

Henry stomped a foot.  "I ain' no boy an' you ain' no girl.  We is ghosts;  that's all there is to 't."

Judy leaned back into the chair.  "What am I supposed to do, Henry?" she asked.  "And if I'm a ghost like you, why can't I choose to feel or not feel?  Why can't I control the tactile sense like you can.  I don't believe I'm the same as you."

"You'll learn the tricks.  We can feel each other if we want," Henry explained.  "Else we can..."  Judy shivered as he strode across the room and walked himself right through her and the chair.

"Ya shouldna lef' yer body."

"I didn't do that on purpose."

"Don' matter,"  Henry twinkled his eyes at her.  "Looky here, girl, alls I know is this.  Yer body got away an' now yer stuck, jus' like me.  I like bein' stuck an' you don' seem like yer gonna take to 't very well.  Tomorrow's Halloween.  That's like, my main gig as the cool cats say.  I was hopin' t' hook up with them kids downstairs but now I ain' so sure.  I gotta feelin' yer gonna mess stuff up for me."

Judy studied Henry for a moment.  "You don't really know what's going on with me, do you?"

"I met some like you before," Henry replied.  "I got away from 'em quick as I could and that's jus' 'bout what I'm fixin' t' do right now."

"Hold on a minute."  Judy willed herself to touch his arm and was as surprised as Henry when she actually did.  "Oh!" she squeaked.

"Yer catchin' right on," Henry allowed.

"It's a lot," Judy said through a sob. "It's a lot to get used to.  I mean, I'll never see my parents again.  I'll never..."

"Quit it!" Henry interrupted.  "You'll get over all that stuff.  Lots o' folks do.  I ain' never seen mine since I died a long long time ago.  It don' bother me one l'il ol' bit!"

"I think you're lonely," Judy observed.  "Under those freckles and that smart aleck attitude there's a lonely little boy."

"I ain' neither," Henry insisted.  "I'm gonna do this Halloween thing here.  It's too late t' change my mind.  I was hopin' mebbe you'd help me.  It'd take yer mind offa bein' a dead person."

"And I suppose this is your way of talking me into it?" Judy said, deadpan.

"I'm doin' 't," Henry said.  "You go ahead an' do whatever ya want.  Wander 'round up here bein' a dead woman if that's what ya want.  I got stuff t' do."

Judy touched his arm again.  "I'll make you a deal, Henry.  I'll go with you to see the children downstairs.  I'll help you if I can.  If it's too much for me, I'll..."

"Good 'nough!"  Henry butted in.  "Let's get shakin' bacon!"

Judy followed Henry from the room.  She stopped abruptly, realizing she had forgotten her things.  She went back into the room and attempted to take the portable book shelf from the window sill.  Her hand passed through the shelf, books and all.  She willed herself to feel but couldn't get a grip on her possessions no matter how hard she concentrated.  She sat down in the chair, sadder than ever.

"Whatsa matter witchu now?" Henry was back.

"I came back to get my things but I can't make myself feel them.  It will break my Mom and Dad's hearts if they have to move all my belongings."

"I thought you were followin' me," Henry accused.  "I got all the way down and there you weren't."

"Didn't you hear what I just said?" Judy asked.  "I can't will myself to grasp my things."

"You ain' got no things,"  Henry said slowly as if Judy couldn't hear him.  "You are dead an' ain' gonna feel nothin' like that no more.  You can touch other ghosts 'less they don' wantchu to.  You don' live here no more.  You are dead.  You might's well get used t' the idea, ain' nothin' ya can do 'bout 't."

Judy rose from the chair, resigned anew to her fate.  "I'll follow you."

Henry went through the open door and Judy followed.  He disappeared into the floor and Judy made her way to the elevators.  Soon he was at her side.  "Whatchu doin' now?"

"This is just too much for me," Judy whispered.  "You go ahead.  I'll wait until someone takes the elevator down and catch a ride with them."

"Ya don't have t' whisper!" Henry screeched.

"I know, I know," Judy whispered.  "They can't hear us or see us.  We are dead.  We are ghosts."

"Now yer catchin' on.  Oh, an' don' go tryin' t' find yer body," Henry warned.  "You shouldna got outside 't in the firs' place.  Ya gotta find another way or jus' go 'round an' have fun like me.  It's too late for you t' die normal now."

"I was a lot of things in my life," Judy said.  "Believe me, normal wasn't one of them.  I guess it's fitting that I can't have a normal death either."

"Yeah, yer a real riot," Henry commented.  "I'm goin' t' the kids now, that's on the secon' floor.  Whatever you do, don' leave this hospital an' get lost.  Ain' nothin' sadder 'n forever than a ghost losin' its way."

Henry dissipated like a wisp of smoke.  Judy decided to walk the corridor, maybe see what was happening behind a few closed doors.  She ended up going to the end of the hall where she stared through the sliding glass doors that opened onto an outdoor patio area.  She pushed her hand against the handle.  The door didn't budge but Judy almost fell through it when her hand met no resistance. 

"Don' go out there."  Henry stood next to her.  His face wasn't wearing its usual smirk and, well, he seemed almost human.  "I don' know whatsa matter with me," he said.  "I ain' never worried 'bout nobody my whole time.  I got lotsa stuff t' be doin' but I can't concentrate knowin' yer jus' gonna go an' get yerself in a jam."

"Why can't I go out there?" Judy asked.

"It's windy out there," Henry said.  "You get yerself sucked up 'n end up jus' any ol' place.  Outside ain' no favorable place for ghostin'.  Come on downstairs.  I'll meetcha at the elevator on the secon' floor.  I don' really need much help but if yer with me I won' have t' worry 'bout you gettin' in trouble."

"You're really quite a nice boy when you drop that devil-may-care attitude." Judy reached out and touched his face.  "Henry, I do believe you are blushing."

"I ain' nothin' nice," Henry hissed.  "See ya 'round!"  He fell through the floor.  Judy took one more wistful glance out the glass then turned away.

She followed a couple onto the elevator.  She had to ride down and up a few times because most of those on the upper floors were going down to the main floor.  She had to wait for someone to stop and get off at the second floor.  The stairs were tempting but she couldn't get used to the uncomfortable feeling when people moved and stepped through her.  At least in the elevator they stepped in and tended to stand in one place. 

Henry was waiting for her when Judy finally made it to the second floor.  He behaved himself and stayed within sight, then stopped at a set of double doors.  A sign above the doors read, 'Children's Wing'.  "Here's what we do," Henry began without preamble,  "There's eight or ten kids in there.  They're allays gettin' tests 'n stuff so I ain' sure exac'ly how many there are. We'll touch each one of 'em, like hold their hand or somethin'.  I woulda picked out one of 'em, made friends an' had 'im help me but now I ain' got time."

"What will transpire when we touch them?" Judy asked.

"What will what?  Hey, don' use those ten dollar words on me."  Henry was impatient and could hardly stand still as he spoke to her.

Judy repeated the question, "What will happen between me and a child whose hand I touch?"

"Yer jus' gettin' a feel for 'em," Henry answered.  "They're mos'ly older kids, nobody under ten 'cept one l'il girl but we won' worry 'bout her.  Ya jus' give 'em a feel so I can figger out who's gonna do what tomorrow night."  Henry stepped toward the entrance.  "C'mon, follow me through.  Yer gonna have t' learn t' do this or you ain' gon' be able t' do no ghostin'."

Henry walked through the steel door and Judy followed.  She felt a 'thwop' sound while passing through and meant to ask Henry if he felt the same thing but he was already off down the hallway muttering something about just getting the job done.

Judy forgot her own problems, even the fact that she was dead, when she entered the roomful of terminally ill children.  There were twelve beds in the rectangular room, arranged six to a side. Each space was equipped with a curtain track on its ceiling so the patients could have a modicum of privacy if they chose to.  Only one of the spaces had the curtains pulled shut.

Henry was moving from bed to bed, holding hands, touching a face here and there.  'This is no place for a Halloween party,' Judy thought.  The wall behind each bed was decorated with pictures obviously drawn by the occupants of the beds.  There were ghosts and goblins in the pictures, witches flying through the air.

Judy drifted toward the space with the curtain pulled.  "Don' bother with that one," Henry advised.  "She's too l'il an' too sick."

Judy stepped through the curtain.  The bed, a replica of the one Judy had spent the past three weeks in, seemed much larger because of the tiny person it held.  Judy was unable to determine the gender of the child by looking at its face.  Thin wisps of hair lay like fine thread on the pillow.  Judy pulled her eyes from the child and saw a picture of daisies on the wall.  'Loreli' was scrawled across the bottom of the drawing.  Judy looked upon the child's face once more, entranced by the fine web of veins on the closed eyelids.  "So you're a little girl."

Henry poked his head through the curtain.  Judy almost warned him to be quiet but remembered that no one living could hear them.  "C'mon," Henry urged, "Don' mess with that poor l'il girl.  C'mon out an' see my plans."

"I'll be out in a few minutes," Judy assured him.  "Be patient, Henry.  I need to sit and rest a bit."

"I ain' no patient," Henry mumbled as his head withdrew from the curtain.

Judy returned her attention to the little girl.  "Loreli...  that's a beautiful name," Judy mused.  She touched the child's face and her eyes popped open.  "Oh my!" Judy exclaimed.  Henry was wrong about this one.  She was full of energy and definitely aware of Judy's presence.

Loreli's lips moved but no sound came from her.  "I know, I know," Judy said.  "Don't try to talk, Sweetheart.  I'll just sit here with you for a while so we can get to know one another.  I know what you're feeling.  You don't have to speak."

Henry's head popped through the curtain again.  "Oh no you didn't!  I knew it.  I toldja don' go messin' butchu did it anyways.  You better c'mon out o' there.  I gotta tell ya some stuff."

Judy touched her lips with her free hand, a gesture meant to tell Henry to wait.  She assumed he understood because his head backed out through the fabric of the curtain.  Loreli's eyes slowly shut and Judy whispered to her, "Hush little baby; don't say a word..."  There was most definitely a connection here.  Judy was filled with a sense of peace as Loreli drifted off to sleep.

Judy arose and melted through the curtain.  She found Henry standing by a boy's bed across the way.  "I thought you said they wouldn't feel us," she said to him.  "That little girl definitely knew I was there.  She spoke to me and I sang her to sleep."

"You one goofy ghost," Henry said, "I toldja t' leave that one alone.  But, oh no, you gotta go an' do exac'ly what I tell you not t' do, then you act like I lied to ya or somethin'.  That l'il girl is ready t' go over, I tell ya."

"Let's don't argue," Judy said.  "I didn't mean to imply that you were a liar.  I thought you meant all of the children wouldn't be aware of us.  I still don't understand why you prefer that I ignore Loreli."

"That's it!" Henry exclaimed.  "That's jus' it.  You don' wanna make no bonds with live people, 'specially ones like that l'il girl who ain' gonna be alive too long.  You shouldna learnt her name.  An' I am a liar, so there!  I jus' don' like nobody accusin' me o' lyin' when I ain't."  He stepped closer to the boy's bed.  "C'mere an' touch this boy's hand."

Judy did so and shook her head.  "I don't feel anything.  It's like pressing my hand against a brick wall."

"There ya go," Henry laughed.  "Now yer gettin' 't.  Jus' tell this boy he's gonna have a fine time Halloween night.  Say that to him three or four times."

Judy felt silly as she did Henry's bidding.  "Now what?" she asked.

"Now go 'round the room.  There's nine kids not countin' that l'il girl.  Jus' tell 'em all they're gonna have a real good time come Halloween night.  You tell 'em Henry said so an' yer his bestest friend in the whole wide world."

Judy went from bed to bed.  She found it difficult to convey Henry's message to these poor sick Children.  When she came to Loreli's curtained space she felt compelled to go in but found Henry blocking her way.  He stood in front of her shaking his head.  She went around him to the next bed and finished the round.  "Now what?" she said to Henry.

"Yeah, now what," Henry parroted.  "Now what is this:  Us spirits, we got lotsa energy.  We can save 't up, then use 't t' make stuff happen for us.  That's why we hadda tell all these kids 'bout tomorrow.  That way they'll be ready t' have some fun."

"Henry, what're you going to do," Judy asked softly, "These children are very ill.  You have to be careful with them."

"You jus' gotta wait 'n see," Henry grinned.  " We jus' checked 'em out you 'n me.  We gotta rest now.  Tomorrow night, nine o' clock, we gon' rock this joint!"

"So we have to sleep at night just like when we were alive?"

"Nah, nothin' like that.  We don' need t' sleep.  We gotta save energy when we're plannin' somethin' big.  I save up all year an' you'll see what that means tomorrow night.  Right now I'm gonna rest in the lady's restroom."  He chuckled.  "Get 't...  rest in the restroom?"  Henry wiggled his eyebrows.  "Wanna go with me?"

"No thank-you," Judy replied.  "As exciting as that sounds, I think I'll go sit with Loreli."

"You ain' gon' be in no mood t' party ya go messin' with that l'il girl.  I keep on tellin' ya an' tellin' ya," Henry warned.

Judy drifted toward Loreli's bed.  'I'm drifting,' she thought, 'Just like Henry.  He doesn't really walk.  He drifts from one place to another.'  "I'll be okay," she said to Henry.  "Tomorrow's my birthday.  I'll spend it with you."

 

"You know that," Henry chortled.  "You'll be one day old an' we got us a date!"  He had his ogle face on as he dissolved into thin air.

A couple of nurses were making their rounds in the Children's Room, dispensing meds and good cheer.  Judy couldn't help but feel that they would, in some way, be able to detect her presence.  On a whim, she followed a maintenance man down the hall to the elevators.  She had a bit of luck as the man pulled out a key and opened the 'Hospital Staff Only' door.  She went right in with him, then realized her mistake as he punched a button for the sixteenth floor.

Judy was frantic to visit her old room.  The maintenance man stepped out and Judy watched the floor indicator lights on the wall of the elevator.  When ten lit up, she took a breath and walked through the door.  'Thwop' and there she was, standing in the hallway a couple of doors down the hall from her room.  The door was ajar so Judy peeked in.  "Oh God," she moaned.  There was her Father holding her Mother.  An empty box sat on the bed.  They must be here for her things.

Judy's Father rocked his wife gently back and forth, speaking all the time, almost a chant.  "Our Jellybean is with God now...  there is no more pain..  don't cry..  don't cry..  Our Jellybean is..."

Judy began to sing in a voice they were unable to hear.  "Nights in white satin."  They began to dance as Judy sang the words.  She didn't think she knew them all but they came on their own, each and every one of them.  She hummed the lead notes in the instrumental bridge of the song.  When she reached the end, her mother had stopped crying.  She was kissing tears from a face Judy had never seen cry.  Judy walked into them, felt the incredible strength and love each had for the other and both for her.  Judy sobbed as only a ghost can sob.  "There is only one of them."  They gathered her belongings quickly.  Judy went with them to the elevator.  She rode it to the first floor and, just before they reached the doors to the hospital, a man entered.  A gust of wind carried a host of leaves in his wake.

'I'll be blown away,' Judy thought.  She watched her parents go out the door.  She held them in her sight until they were taken by the night.  Judy made her way, entranced, through the lobby to the stairs.  She felt them passing through her, thwop.  thwop thwop, pedestrian traffic.  She was too sad to care.

Back in Loreli's space, Judy sat in the chair by the bed.  She found Loreli's hand under the blanket, willed herself to feel.  A sweet little girl voice spoke into her mind, "It's okay, it's okay.  You go ahead and cry."  Judy felt the small child's hand, its offer of refuge, flesh on flesh.  She gave herself over to it, allowed herself the peace and respite of Loreli's pillow.

"Hi Baby.  How's Daddy's special girl?"  Judy drifted slowly away as Loreli's eyes looked upon the kind face of her Father.

"Daddy," Loreli said sleepily, "I got a angel."

Judy exited the room.  She went through the wall, not even thinking about it.  The thwop thing was there but seemed lesser now.  The terrible sadness and loss she felt last night seemed to be fading as well.  Frantic to recapture the moment, Judy went to her old room.  It was vacant and antiseptic clean.

The chair had been moved back next to the bed.  Judy sat in it and was welcomed like a long lost friend.  She went away to a realm of mists.  Shadow shapes passed at the edge of her vision.  'They're getting ready for me,' Judy thought.  'They know today is...  what is today?'  She faded away mercifully into a land of smoke and didn't come out until...

"I figgered I might find ya here."

"Where am I?"

"Yer where I metcha."

"Those people...  shapes in the fog.."

"Yer bound an' determined t' go there.  I keep tellin' ya, they ain' ready for ya jus' yet.  If they was, you'd a-been gone."

"What am I supposed to do?"

"Yer s'posed t' come with me.  We got us a date, remember?"

"Henry, can you help me out of here?"

"Sure 'nough!"

Thwop!  Judy peered through the tenth floor window.  There they were, the twinkling lights.  They used to mean something to her.  What was it?  She was desperate to remember.

Henry touched her hand.  "C'mon, 't's time for the party.  That l'il girl even woke up."

"Take me then," Judy said simply.

"Jus' what I wanna hear from my date," Henry said happily.  Judy had no time for a reply as Henry whisked her away to another world, Henry's world.

The room was indefinite in shape.  Skeletons danced on a strobe-lit platform.  Shrill voices cackled invitations from dark doorways.  Judy pulled her hand back in alarm as something scratched it.  Henry stood next to her, though you would never guess his identity by looking at him.  He was some kind of bat creature.  The long nails on his paws were what had scratched her hand.  "Is this the Children's Room?" Judy asked fearfully.

"Darn tootin' fig newton!" Henry replied.  He hopped into the air and took flight.  'Round and 'round Judy's head he flew. 

"How did you talk the hospital into going along with this?" Judy asked.

Henry shrunk himself to bat-size and lit on her shoulder.  "I'm gonna tell ya once an' that's it!" he squeaked into her ear.  "This is my Halloween place.  It's like my inbetweener's playground.  I gotta set 't up t' fit somewheres real, then push myself hard t' make 't happen.

Costumed children were raking leaves into a huge pile while others dove in and allowed themselves to be covered up.  "Careful there!" Henry squeaked.  "We're gonna light that pile on fire perty soon now.  We don' want no baked ghouls or boys."

"This is going to be one big mess to clean up," Judy observed.  "You aren't really going to burn those leaves in here, are you?"

Henry flitted about a bit.  "I jus' toldja, we ain' 'in here'.  All the l'il sick kids is in their beds jus' like they're s'pose t' be.  Now c'mon, les' go bob for glizzards.  Henry flew off in the direction of the children.  Leaves and cornhusks flew up in the path of his wake.  The happy music of excited children was everywhere, incongruous with the shrieking voices emanating from the dark.

Judy glanced down at her hand and was shocked.  Her fingers were impossibly long, skin white, and long black pointy fingernails.  She held the hand up in front of her face and clicked the nails against each other.  This wasn't stage makeup.  The nails were black through and through.  She looked into a wall of glass or sheet of water, she wasn't sure which.  "Oh no," she murmured to herself.  "He's turned me into Elvira."

A small hand tugged at her dress.  "Will you go wif me to the costume contest?"

Judy looked down into the face of a perfect fairy, pointy ears, wings and all.  "Don't be afraid honey," she crooned.  "My name is Judy.  I sat with you last night."

The fairy fluttered her wings, looked away, embarrassed.  "I know.  That's why I want you to go wif me.  I don't wanna lose you no more."

"Oh Loreli," Judy cried, "You sweet sweet little girl.  I don't wanna lose you no more either.  Would you mind if I held you?"

The tiny fairy danced into the air and landed in Judy's welcome embrace.  She threw her arms around Judy's neck and whispered in her ear.  "Don't say my name so loud.  Everyone will know who I am if you say it loud."

Judy ran her fingers down the length of Loreli's long beautiful hair.  "I won't," she promised.  "Let's go find that costume contest."

As they began to make their way through Henry's Halloweenland, Judy realized how perfectly everything fit in its dark way.  There were ten areas of activity, one befitting each child in the room.  The spaces the two empty beds occupied were marked by a rickety sign above them.  It read, 'Wasteland'.  A large raven perched on top of the sign.  It stretched its massive wings and spoke to them as they passed, "Caw Caw." 

Judy's fairy snuggled its face into her throat as she hurried past the threatening bird.  A large furry bat flitted about as a blindfolded child tried to pin a tail to it.  Youngsters yelled encouragement and direction to the child with the pin and tail.  The bat paused and squeaked as the pin stuck it in the butt.  The children laughed and clapped, clasped hands in a circle and danced around the winner.

Henry landed on Judy's shoulder.  "Wanna play?"

"I'm taking my Fairy Child to the costume contest," Judy said to the bat.

"We got glizzards in a bucket," Henry offered.  "They got sharp l'il needle teeth so you gotta bite 'em 'fore they bite you!"

"We'll just wander around until we find the costume contest," Judy replied.  "You've done a wonderful job here, Henry.  I'm sure this is more fun than most of these Children have ever had."

"Wait'll next year," Henry squeaked, "I'm gonna do a prison."

"You're too much," Judy said as her Fairy squirmed.  "We have to go, Henry.  This little elf wants to find the costume contest."

Henry nibbled Judy's ear.  "Do a l'il somethin' for a guy first, wouldja?  Pull that pin outa my butt."

Judy used her free hand to do as he asked.  Henry took off like he was shot from the barrel of a gun.  Judy and Loreli moved through the dry crackling leaves by the light of an October Moon.  There was the mean nurse cackling like a witch, orderlies dancing with skeletons.  Loreli whispered the names of the children in Judy's ear as they cavorted by.  Judy was consumed with a feeling of overwhelming loss and regret as she realized she was no longer one of them.  'That's what Henry wants,' she said softly to herself,  'just to be part of the flawed and fragile stuff of humanity.'

"Huh?" Loreli asked in a voice smaller than herself.

"Nothing, Darling Child," Judy nuzzled the top of Loreli's head.  "I was just talking to myself."

"Can we go to my bed and lay down?" Loreli asked.  "I don't really care about that ol' costume contest.  I don't feel very good."

Judy crossed the room and stepped behind the curtain where Loreli's bed should have been.  There was a throne there, white on white on white.  Black light made everything white sparkle fuzzy.  Loreli giggled weakly at Judy's blue-white teeth.  Judy climbed up and sat on the huge chair, Loreli held close against her breast.  "Sleep Child, if you can," she crooned.  "You're very brave and now you must rest."

"Surprise!"  The curtain flew open and all the revelers stood 'round the throne.  Henry, the bat, was now Henry, the handsome and engaging emcee, tails and all.  "By unanimous vote, we find you, Tiny Fairy and you, Dark Angel, co-winners of the costume contest!"

Everyone cheered and tossed confetti but Loreli wasn't having any of it.  She kept her head buried against Judy's breast.  Henry raised an arm and up came his dark satin cape.  "Off with you now," he announced regally, "All you hobgoblins and ghosts.  Read carefully those scavenger lists and hurry yourselves back!  I will mark the hour!"

"Henry, come here," Judy called in her whisper voice.  He stepped up to the chair and Judy drew his head down with her hand.  She kissed his forehead.  "I know what's going on now."

"Me too," Henry said softly.

"This is your chance," Judy said.  "My being a stubborn woman, bound and determined to sit in a chair, muffed it all up for you.  I'll bet you could take my place with Loreli."

Loreli wrapped her tiny arms tight around Judy's neck.  Her wisps of hair fell off and her wings disappeared.  Henry's magick wasn't strong enough to keep her.  "No!" she cried.  "Judy's my angel.  I already tol' my Daddy.  You can't leave me now!"

"She's right," Henry said, "'Sides, I gotta finish this here party.  I was t' leave 't t' you, no tellin' what'd happen.  You'd jus' mess the whole thing up."

Judy held Loreli tightly.  Something was pulling at them and it was growing stronger by the second.  "Henry!" Judy cried out, "Why didn't you tell me I was an angel?"

Henry had begun to fade from her vision.  "You hadda figger that our for yer own self!"

 

They were in Loreli's bed proper now.  They could hear the sound of a noisy alarm and frantic human voices crying, "Loreli seven!  Loreli seven!"

They drifted down the misty path, the lady and the tiny girl.  Shadow shapes whose name was love gathered them up, gathered them up and away.